Full Circle Feedback
Being Constructive
"Feedback is the breakfast for champions"
- Ken Blanchard -
CONSTRUCTIVE LANGUAGE
Constructive language phrases a potentially negative message in a positive way, whereas destructive language directs blame and criticism toward the receiver, creating defensiveness. Receivers are likely to become defensive when the sender's language expresses any or all of the following:
- Superiority over the receiver.
- Indifference or apathy about an issue of importance to the receiver.
- Negative evaluation or judgment of the receiver - as opposed to neutral descriptions or observations.
- Command or control over the receiver.
- Skepticism or doubt about the receiver's credibility or the legitimacy of their claims.
CONSTRUCTIVE LANGUAGE IN FEEDBACK
Using constructive language is a vital element to effective feedback; feedback that is harsh and critical often serves to demoralise rather than support those who receive it. With constructive feedback, the underlying assumption is that the aim is to assist and encourage development and learning; to ‘construct’ a new view or perception of a situation.
Providing feedback will only be effective if it leads to a positive change or development. Feedback needs to suggest for improvement or invite a commitment to action. With this in place, the feedback will have fulfilled its intended purpose, to acknowledge or promote development in the recipient.
PREPARING TO GIVE FEEDBACK
Providing constructive and sincere feedback is one of the greatest gifts you can give. Sadly however, most feedback, most of the time is ignored. It does not “get in” for several reasons such as defensiveness on the part of the receiver or lack of skill on the part of the giver. Until feedback is truly heard by the other person there is little chance for reflection or changed behavior.
Feedback is data. It is other’s views and other’s recommendations offered as a gift. It can inform people as to the effect their behavior is having on others. It can also help people objectively assess their performance in an area.
Feedback affords people an opportunity to learn. Acknowledging feedback can boost confidence and self-esteem. Developmental feedback can be essential in improving performance.Balancing acknowledging and developmental feedback is important. If you always give acknowledging feedback it may devalue the feedback and have less impact. If you always give development feedback you may be perceived as nit-picky and negative causing some people to switch off.
To be constructive with your feedback, always be clear of your reasons for doing it. Are you giving feedback to “help them” or to “meet your own need”? If you are giving feedback to help, it is purely “for” the other person’s benefit and you usually do not have a personal stake in the result. If you are giving feedback for your own needs because the other person's performance directly affects yours or your team's work, it is still preferable that you do it in a way that shows concern for the other person, although not essential.
Different people have different preferred ways of giving and receiving feedback. It is important that you understand your response to feedback as well as how you act when giving feedback.
Content contributed by Helen Morley, 2021